“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” (Phyllis Diller)

Back in the 80’s, an electronic giant named “Crazy Eddie” dominated the east coast airways with its screwball commercials promising that their “prices are ins-a-a-a-ane!”  Eddie’s shrieks were meant to be both annoying and unforgettable, the better to brand the minds of consumers within the sound of his voice.   The ads were quite popular until Eddie went bankrupt, mired in lawsuits and fraud charges.   Crazy Eddie became an Angry Eddie.

I once knew an Angry Eddie.   He was a short, hirsute man who owned a furniture store in New Jersey and had a unique cross section of traits; the physicality of a hedgehog and the personality of a snapping turtle.  He wandered about much like the character Pig-Pen from the Charlie Brown comic strip, but instead of a cloud of dirt trailing around him, he had a fog of outrage and indignation.  Legend has it that once during an evening out with his buddies, Eddie drove his car into a ditch, causing his passengers to tumble about like a sack of loose potatoes.  It should be fairly noted that Eddie was not intoxicated; it’s believed he was in a fight to the death with the power steering. 

Which leads me to the point of this post:  Why are people so angry these days?

Last week, I apparently took too long to pull into a parking space in a strip mall, and since I’m a courteous driver who allows others to pull out first as opposed to doing a blindsiding Mario Andretti into my chosen spot, the driver behind me, a red-faced guy whose head resembled a chub of bologna, screamed out of his window, cussing and swearing, gesticulating that he didn’t have “all ******* day,” before whipping past and flipping a hand gesture that likely originated at a Sex Pistols concert.   He was an Angry Eddie.  It appears as a group they are multiplying so quickly, auto insurance actuaries have formulated a special rate for them. 

We can speculate for hours as to why: The anxious state of the world, a crush of financial worries, dogged health issues, troublesome relationships that seem to permeate so many lives, or the persistent need to engage in political fights on Facebook, but I think it goes deeper.

I think it’s like this: Before we come to Earth and begin our lives, we’re handed a list of lessons—who we choose as our parents, the career path we’ll follow, where we’ll live, whether we’ll find a soulmate or endure painful bonds, and a mix of other earthly experiences selected from life’s menu.  Our soul knows life won’t be constant joy, but it understands what lies ahead.

Then, in the womb, our best-laid plans are put in a Universal dryer and set on “fluff.”   All bets are off, and we’re left without a blueprint to find the cheese at the end of the maze.  

Life Lesson: Even careful plans can go wrong.  You might as well learn how to dance.