“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.” (N. R. Narayana Murthy)

I just finished the season finale of one of my favorite shows, the British drama “Call the Midwife,” and I’m still wiping tears from my keyboard after an effusive cry. The series captures life in a Poplar, a suburb of East London, from the 1960s to the early 1970s, exploring the themes of birth, death, and everything in between through the experiences of the midwives and nuns who run a clinic in this working-class neighborhood.  This episode was particularly sentimental, and by the time the final background soundtrack was queued, I was spent.  A gushing heap of waterworks and a much-needed exhale.

Change is the one constant that never leaves us, though it’s the one we resist most often.  So many of us live in two worlds; the reality that unfolds with each passing day, and the other, a life we cradle in our imaginations, shaped by an idealized version our inner storyteller has designed.  If we’re not careful, we can miss the moments in between, remaining stuck in the illusion that is owned by our daydreams. 

If we have the courage to view our mistakes as potential architects of the unwelcome in our life, the initial path our free will would not have chosen can in time become a path that brings unexpected joy and opportunity.  Years ago, while serving as a hospice volunteer, I had the privilege of sitting with a beautiful, elderly woman on one of the last nights of her life.  She remained genteel and charming in her fragile state and generously shared with me meaningful memories from her story, many born of the unforeseen, and a reminder, as she counselled me, to “trust in God.” 

It took me back to one of the hardest seasons of my life, when I believed the unenviable position in which I found myself was in part due to poor decisions. While that was true, what I couldn’t see then was that God was using that season of my life – and the profound lessons learned – to guide me towards what was to come next.  The perceived errors were right on course, their timing impeccable. 

The next time you find yourself dwelling on a mistake, be courageous and step back.  Absorb the lesson it came to teach, then release it to the past and remain open to where it may lead.  In time, you may look back in gratitude.  Never underestimate how your missteps can help usher something new and beautiful into your life as you move toward an appointed time.

When we accept that change is inevitable and grant ourselves enough grace for when we fall, we come to realize that much of life’s hardship begins as an unyielding fear.